I’ve gotta say…reading the Newsletter update from May 6th made me SO sad. After the initial update in April about DUC moving to Lifetime Games, I was hoping that the next update would tell us what we can be assured to KEEP when the move to Lifetime occurs…but instead, I feel like Miss Diva was saying goodbye to us and to DUC as we know it. Until this point, I felt like we had some hope, but now my hope is dimming, and my denial stage is crumbling. I finally cried, and my heart is breaking. Without DUC as we know it, a huge whole would burn into my heart. I would miss so much.
First of all, I haven’t really been able to design this past year because I’ve been flat on my back with a bulging disc and bone spurs, making designing difficult (and hence me only occasionally entering challenges, and all with recycled makeovers). It was getting better, and I was starting to think I could begin designing again soon, but my bulging disc herniated in March, and I’m back to square one. Do you know how sad I am that I might never be able to design anything intricate again on the FM, especially any new Disney makeovers? It kills me that I might not have a chance to design again before DUC is gone. ::sigh:: Divas, if you can, please design your hearts out until DUC moves? We might not have the ability afterward.
So if DUC truly isn’t DUC anymore when it moves, I won’t just miss the FM. It goes without saying that I will miss all my beautiful, wonderful divas, and seeing your AMAZING designs and talent! I’m blown away every time I visit one of your pages (which is something I haven’t been able to do much either this year because of my situation). I’m so grateful for Camelot (thank you, Marion!) and Facebook, as we will be able to keep in touch. But I have to admit, I will miss seeing all the new, amazing makeovers you ladies would create. (Now I’m crying all over again…)
Last, but not least (and now I’m bawling trying to type this), I would SO miss how much I was able to make a difference for you divas here on DUC with my Fashionmaker Guide Blog. Because of my health problems (not just my back, but Crohn’s and my other health issues), my life is pretty small. I have yet to be able to have children, my writing/editing career has been stalled, and I haven’t been able to attend church for a year (can’t sit that long), nor take part in any volunteer work.There hasn’t been much I can do to make any kind of difference in this world. My limit for sitting or standing currently is about 5 minutes. It is so frustrating not being able to move your body, shower on your own, or even sit through a meal. Living my life flat on my back this past year has been so monotonous, unfulfilling, and completely frustrating, not to mention painful. I’ve felt like such a burden, a leech, and that I don’t give much back to the world. So with that all in mind…can you imagine how much being able to help you all, just a little, through this teeny-tiny blog, has meant to me? It’s meant EVERYTHING. (Tears streaming down my face…)
And with that said, I want to thank anyone who has ever stopped by this blog and left a comment, letting me know how much I’ve helped you, or asking more questions so I can continue to help. It’s made me feel less of a leech on this world, and I thank you so much for that. Many of you have told me how “selfless” I’ve been by providing the blog and continuing to manage it, but really, it has been so rewarding for me, not selfless at all. If the FM no longer exists after the move, my heart will be broken, because I won’t have this small way of giving back. So again…thank you, divas. My heart will always be grateful to you and grateful to God for the years I had on DUC.